It's constant and I know that most parents feel it in some form one way or another.
Mine however is beginning to feel at an all time high.
Ever since my journey into photography has become a second job I worry that it is impacting my daughter. While I try to space time between shoots and not book jobs some weekends all together I am constantly working. Which my goodness is such a blessing and I am fully aware of that as I never dreamed to be this busy. However between a full time job and now a part time photography business I am beginning to feel the guilt.
It comes in many ways. Guilt that I schedule sessions at 10am so I am not spending weekend morning's with my daughter. Guilt that I really enjoy taking photographs and having some creative me time. Guilt that sometimes I don't curl into my husband on the couch because I have photos to edit.
G U I L T
I even feel guilty that this blog has taken somewhat of a backbone. Because I adore this space and the community of creatives I have met because of it. So I guess this was just a mini "I need to get this off my chest" session.
Tell me how you deal with all of it and find the best balance.
I just want to be my best everyday and never look back and say "I wish I did..."
We ALL feel this sweet friend - but guilt is the devil and it allows us to start doubting ourselves and our abilities!! You are an amazing mama - you deserve this creative time to yourself and it is helping little Miss P in so many ways too x
ReplyDeleteI feel ALL of this, so much! But look at P's face! She is so happy, you are doing a GREAT job, friend!
ReplyDeleteDefinitely feel you on this one, girl! But you definitely deserve to do what you love and have a creative outlet. In the end it makes you a better person and a better mama and a good role model! I try to think of it as quality time over quantity of time.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could help you but I've been feeling the exact same way lately and in fact, even have a similar post in my drafts. There's SO much that I feel like I'm missing out on with Mason because I work and I feel so guilty about it (and jealous of others). So, sadly I have no advice for you because I feel like I am barely swimming myself, but just know that I understand how you feel and if you ever need to vent, I'm here! xo
ReplyDeleteI feel it too, the urge to slow down and just "be" more with my kids, Owen especially. I know you must feel it more since I know you're really busy. Just know you're a good mom and that you shouldn't feel so down about it. It's just the guilt creeping in. Maybe a sign to add a little less in the coming weeks?
ReplyDeleteWe go through these moments! But keep in mind that your photography business may lead to more time with P in the long run; you're just putting in your time now. You're killing it mama! ;-)
ReplyDeleteI feel like my "mom guilt" is at an all-time high right now also. With a toddler and now a newborn I feel that I don't have enough attention to give them both. If I'm feeding the baby or holding her too much, I'm sad because I missed out on playing with my toddler or helping her with a bath or bedtime routine. If I participate in the bath/bedtime with the toddler, then I feel guilty because I let the baby sleep for several hours in her rock n play. Its so difficult! I don't have any words of wisdom right now, except I'm hoping to find a balance soon. And we just have to give ourselves grace. <3
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